10. That white van with “Arizona Grocery Delivery” painted on the side has been outside your house for 7 hours.
9. During a call, you hear a song in the background: “I fought the law, and the law won.”
8. Heavy breathing by two people
7. Someone says, “Please speak louder,” and it’s not the person you called.
6. You call your mom and hear “This call is being monitored for quality purposes.”
5. You call your doctor’s office and hear “If you voted for Obama, please press 1.”
4. You can hear someone eating potato chips.
3. You once emailed a friend: “Depends on what the meaning of ISIS.”
2. On your income tax return, you listed your occupation as Mayor of San Tan Valley.
1. You have an uncle named Joey “Big Fist” Giovanni.