Letterman’s Top Ten for Saturday, November 10, 2012 — Signs You’re A Lame Spy

10. You fear heights, loud noises, air travel, and enclosed spaces

9. You insist on wearing a cape

8. By day, you work at a hardware store; by night, you work another shift at the hardware store

7. Everyone knows you can’t swim

6. Your only gadget: cufflinks that shoot smaller cufflinks

5. E-mail address is spyguy26@cia.gov

4. 10pm, enter foreign country; 10:05on, executed for espionage

3. Insist on being paid in hugs

2. Ex-girlfriends call you “003 1/2”

1. Only have a learner’s-permit-to-kill

 

 

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