10. “Just had lunch, so I’ll wait another 30 minutes before rescuing someone”
9. “Shark! No, wait — that’s a guy with a hump”
8. “Americans are more buoyant than ever”
7. “I love being half-naked and staring at people”
6. “How long was I asleep?”
5. “The seagulls are talking to me”
4. “Give me a second, I’m working on my tan”
3. “Getting paid to sit on a chair and do nothing? I’m Letterman”
2. “Maybe I should be facing the water”
1. “‘Help’ or ‘kelp’ — who cares?”