Top 10 Things University of Arizona students do to prepare for the fall semester

Top 10

Note: As an introduction to an article titled “Top 7 Things ASU students do,” The Tempe Republic wrote: “Arizona State University students are moving in this weekend and, with them, come a few longstanding stereotypes, traditions and truths.”

To be fair to the university in Tucson, Rose Law Group Reporter provides the following:

10. Strategize how a UA tat artist could find a way to have breakfast with ASU Prez Michael Crow, slip him a mickey, then tattoo a wildcat on his forehead.

9. Hold a series of wild chocolate milk parties.

8. Place signs on the doors of a campus restroom: MEN, WOMEN, SPARKY

7. Construct a Trojan horse that would roll onto the field at Sun Devil Stadium Nov. 21 for the ASU-UA football game and release 100 wildcats.

6. Paint highway signs outside Tucson that read: “ASU Peeps Must Take Bisbee Detour.”

5. Sponsor a UA-ASU hot dog eating contest, where the ASU dogs would be laced with laxative.

4. Hack the Tempe traffic computer system to turn all traffic lights red on the ASU campus.

3. Start a petition drive to rename ASU as Tempe Abnormal.

2. As initiation, freshmen are required to patrol the campus in 12-hour shifts to look for grad students with undergrad degrees from ASU and publish their names in the Arizona Daily Wildcat.

1. Have Donald Trump declare ASU will gladly pay for the wall along the border with Mexico.

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