10. You’ve memorized every word of a commercial touting a cure for toenail fungus.
9. All the button names are worn off the remote, except for “Power off.”
8. Your kids keep singing the theme song to “Flipper.”
7. You go shopping and wonder why everything is not $19.95.
6. By your side is a basket of nerf balls to throw at the screen when a political story comes on.
5. You skip dinner to watch reruns of Archie Bunker in All in the Family.
4. You have a Netflix tattoo.
3. You know all the “common side effects” of more than 45 drugs.
2. The family dog says he’s no longer your best friend.
1. While watching one of those addiction treatment ads, your kids urge you to call.
