By Debra Kamin | The New York Times
Shimea Hooks was so focused on her carry-on full of pumped breast milk that at first she didn’t understand what the agent from the Transportation Security Administration was saying.
Ms. Hooks, 32, was at the San Diego International Airport, about to fly alone for the first time with her son, Caleb, then 5 months old. At the security checkpoint, the agent looked at Ms. Hooks, who is Black, and then down at Caleb, who is half-Korean and looked nothing like her.
“Where’s his dad?” the agent asked.
Caleb has two moms — Ms. Hooks, who adopted him, and her wife, Corritta Lewis, who gave birth to him. At that point, the adoption paperwork had not been finalized, and Ms. Hooks realized she wasn’t carrying any legal documentation to prove her relationship to her son.
“I was a new mom and I had this Asian-looking baby with me,” said Ms. Hooks, who runs a family travel site alongside Ms. Lewis. She believes that she was flagged because she was a single parent traveling alone, and because her child is of a different race. “I was afraid they were going to take my son away from me.”
“This is a delicate balance. We want border patrol and other authorities to take caution if a child is identified as a potential victim of trafficking. At the same time, we are in the era of blended families including blended identities like race or ethnicity and blended family names. I carry my child’s passport and/or passport card whenever I travel so as to avoid any apparent issue with a discrepancy in name and, if you are divorced, I would certainly recommend traveling with identification for your children along with any consents signed by the other party to avoid issue. Many countries now have apps that allow you to download copies of your passport and children’s passports electronically to expedite crossing the border. At a minimum, always keep a photograph or copy of relevant documents on your phone somewhere that is easily accessible.”
Audra Petrolle, family law attorney at Rose Law Group