10. “These weights are 100 pounds each”
9. “My biceps are cut like taxes for the wealthiest one percent”
8. “Of course they won’t publish this on the most important day of my political career”
7. “My flaccid smirk will motivate Americans to get in shape”
6. “What’s the worst people will say about me and a photo of a dumbbell?”
5. “There’s no three-day waiting period at this gun show”
4. “Please, please ask me to take my shirt off…”
3. “Why are the people giggling?”
2. “Please, please, ask me to take off my shorts…”
1. “Maybe now people will take me seriously”