(Based on (Expletive deleted) News Anchor Fired After First Day on Job)
10. Well, you’re wearing two neckties
9. Kept mispronouncing your own name
8. Weatherman tells you to expect an 80% chance of unemployment
7. Your tearful, on-air admission of falsifying your resume
6. Referring to Kim Jong Un as “Our great and powerful leader”
5. No one appreciated your Walter Conkite impression
4. Last story of the broadcast announced a job opening for a news anchor
3. Received congratulatory phone call from Sue Simmons (video of Sue: “What the f**k are you doing!?”)
2. Kept dropping your pants and yelling “This just in!”
1. Aspired to be the next Ernie Anastos (video of Ernie: “Keep f**kin that chicken”)